My Wife & I (Verse 3)

wifeAt long last, I had my chance. Damn! It was hot. It was so hot that the screams came at sporadic intervals which confirmed that she was feeling what I wanted her to feel. She was like “mmm…ah…eewoo…ajei…herh…ɛyɛ shi oo…” Oh my God, I have never been so happy. I had managed to increase the temperature of the water heater in the bathroom when my wife’s mother, my mother-in-law, asked me to set it up. What were you thinking? Bad reader! Lol…let’s move on wae.

If not for a peculiar reason, I would have driven my wife’s mother, my mother-in-law, out of the house. But then I remembered I am a new creation, behold are things are now new for them that are in Christ. I know I haven’t narrated the story of how I met my wife so indulge me for a minute.

When I was an up and coming young man, struggling in the slums of Kyorkor, one hot afternoon I was going to get my usual kenkey, but this time at a location I have never tried. I think it was because of the figure I saw. Abi you know that guys are attracted by what they see and as of the time I was no different. In fact, I think I may have watched her twice.

The kenkey seller, had a shape like Cinderella and a voice like Eve. But then when she turned she looked like Adam, with a beard like Nebuchadnezzar. So I was like “Ah, mamilɛ, is this your real face, or are you putting on makeup?” Then she replied in a heavy and deep voice “Kwɛ bo diɛŋtsɛ obuuu mɔ ona?” What followed next was a physical abuse in broad daylight and that was when I got to know that there is no need for women to fight for equality. They are already there.

So as I lay by the roadside, helpless, and needing help, a black sedan drove to my spot and gorgeous legs came out towards me. She was my type. Yes, me too I get type. She was tall, and hairy, with skin that has been toned by nature to reflect the sun’s rays through every permeable membrane. Her image formed in my eye’s retina making my brain interpret her for who she was. Was I dreaming or am I in heaven to be approached by such a wondrous lady created from God’s special clay? To borrow the words that is used in NIV version of the bible to describe Esther, I will say, “She was fine in form and in features”

Then she lifted my head and placed it on her laps as she offered me first aid. It was soft! Come on, I’m talking about the cotton, gosh! Pay attention! I felt like I was already at the altar, healed through divine intervention. So after offering the first aid and she said “please, what’s your name are you ok?” I couldn’t help but respond, “Yes, I do.”

She chuckled and said “Lemme get you to the hospital for further examination” and that was when I remembered that for all this while, her beauteous beauty had arrested my breath and I had not been breathing!

To be continued…

A Verse by Kotey

Good morning.

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